Thoughts Running Through my Head

Ever just feel like crying?

I hate it when I get like that, there could be nothing at all bothering me and well, I just feel like I should be crying.

Stupid, I know.

So I fucked up pretty big on my presentation for class. Oh yeah and I'm susposed to be the one presenting for a big competition. They should probably just pull me from my event.

It's only been three weeks of classes and already I have no time for anything. Sometimes I wish I had a normal life.

What is normal, and who sets the standards for it? Really why is one thing typical over another, because it's done by the masses? I just wish there weren't these ideals of normalicy, what's right and wrong in other peoples eyes. This is why I'm known for being a little bit crazy. I don't tend to give a damn about what other people think of me. I'd rather be happy and having fun, then be worried about what someone might be thinking. Now if only I could apply this to all aspects of my life.

I still think about things, as much as I try not to, most days there's some kind of memory floating through my sub conscious.

Really with all of my "adventures" it's no wonder I'm a far cry from any semblence of normalicy.

Life would be boring if I didn't live it the way I do, and I hate monotony.






"Take me for what I am, who I was meant to be. And if you give a damn take me baby, or leave me."

It's Been a Long Time, Good Ole Friend

So I haven't posted anything since mid March...oops.

I just looked at my list of 101 things to do in 1001 days, and I can say that I can check some things off of that list. There are still a lot of really good goals on the list that I need to accomplish, and I hope to so within the deadline.

Life's been...unpredictable. I'd rather it be that way though, when things become trite I become bored.

I know that I'm usually the person that can't deal enough to talk about death, but after the recent funerals I feel that I need to make mention of a few things:

A. I do not want a preacher/minister at my funeral. My family doesn't need to be told that in order for them to see me again, they must be saved.

B. I want people to talk about the things they remember about me, stories of any sort.

C. I want people to wear fun bright colors, black should be worn only if someone is very adamant about it. I would love to see a lot of bright or deep red (my favorite color.)

D. I want people to sing, especially people that are tone deaf, that would definitely make me laugh.

E. I want a semi-cheap funeral, I don't want to put a monetary stress on anyone because I have passed away.

That's all I've really thought about and been really adamant about. But you've seen it, so please, please no preacher at my funeral.

On a happier note, I had an internship this summer in Maryland, and I loved it. I should be interning for a second time again this summer. Yay :)



“You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life. ” — Sir Winston Churchill

I Wanted a Good Nap, But I'm Getting a Good Write

I really just wanted a nap, but I'm out of time and out of luck.

Amanda Sponsler and I have a mission, and I plan on fulfilling it.

It's almost my birthday, I have 6 days left.

I will be in Michigan when I turn 21, my friends are telling me that this is unacceptable, but what can you do.

Now that I've put up a few statements, I will try and actually write a little bit. I'm failing. I guess I'm not as much in the mood to write as I though.

People don't like cheater cheater pumpkin eaters.




"Cause it's better to be hated for who you are, then be loved for who you're not."

I Love the Rain

"Theres something sexy about the rain
She said as it came pouring down
It feels like kisses on my skin
She spread her arms and spun around
In a summer island storm
In a field, in a field of sugarcane
She taught me how and, showed me the way
Theres something sexy about the rain

She taught me how and, shes still why
Theres something sexy about the rain

Something sexy ... about the rain
Feels like kisses on my skin
In a summer island storm
Something sexy"

Simple Thoughts Complied and Thrown on a Page

I think I shouldn't be allowed to post after a long night with friends...but anyway, this past weekend was pretty fabulous. I'm so excited that I got to hang out with my amazing friends that mean the world to me. I've missed the girls and I'm definitely going to make every effort to see them a ton more this semester.

I'm am going to be a happy person, right now it's proving a bit more difficult then I had expected but, I'll deal with whatever is thrown at me.

I've surrounded myself with amazing people and I'm so excited to have them in my life. Especially having my sister around, I wasn't sure how well it was going to work out at first but it definitely works. And basically me and my sister are a lot a like, so if people can't respect her as a person, then they really ought to reconsider how they feel about me. There's something about family, something that you just don't mess with. And if you know me, you ought to know not to cross that line.

Maybe, just maybe this makes sense

I've just realized, that maybe what I waited for so long, has been left up to my own accord. I realize that God has plans, but that also my destiny is in part, left to my own accord. That I finally have to step up to the plate. That I have to realize that I can't keep sitting here waiting for something to happen, that I have to make something happen. That I have to try and hit that fastball at 70 mph, that when I try I might strikeout. That I might have three chances and it might not come till I least expect it, that I'll have to push, and fight for that final pitch, but all in all I can't keep waiting for a walk.

Words to Live By

Always be yourself, Because Those Who Mind, Don't Matter, And Those Who Matter, Don't Mind.